Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Can a Newt Become President

Like I said, I don't have any fucking answers.  But I do believe that it's important to ask questions.  So here are a few to let your mind marinate over....can someone named Newt actually be the frontrunner for the Republican presidential nod?  Can Newt Gingrich actually be a step up from Sarah Palin?  What does that say for the state of the Republican party if it is?

I have no answers to these questions but they need to be asked.  And here is a question that really needs to be asked...what the fuck was Newt Gingrich thinking when he said that President Obama exhibited "Kenyan, anti-colonial" behavior"? What's most vexing is that I am not even sure if I should give Newt props for finding innovative ways to disguise racism or not.  Is this repackaging of the 'our president is dark, scary and foreign' fear smear truely innovative or is it tragically tiresome?  I'm not sure but once's important to ask questions.

Newt Gingrich-America's Anti-anti-colonialist

Let's dissect this statement piecemeal and try to illuminate it shall we?  First, our president's behavior is Kenyan....the subtext to that being FUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE.  Because, as we all know, Kenya is evil, populated with the black, bloodless offspring of puppy-raping warlords so if our president is exhibiting Kenyan behavior, that does not bode well for the American people.  Kenyan behavior by our leader will no doubt result in a widespread swine-flu anthrax pandemic, legalized gay-marriage the world over, a nuclear hollocaust or something equally terrifying.  So be very afraid.

Secondly, his behavior is anti-colonial. Now here is where I cannot decipher if old Newt is a truely creative mind or not.  I don't know what anti-collonialism is and I'll wager that ninety percent of all registered Republicans don't either.  But the emotional knee-jerk reaction of most homo-sapiens is to fear that which they do not understand.  So once again, my heart is filled with terror even though I am not entirely sure why.  Now does Newt know this and is he consciously exploiting this? If so that is the mark of the quintesential Republican candidate and the G.O.P. can rejoice because the future of the party is now and his name is Newt.

But maybe he does not know this.  Maybe he, unlike myself, never took Psychology 101 and I am giving him too much credit.  Maybe he is an unimaginative nitwit and his fear-mongering checklist had been exhausted and when pressed for comment, 'anti-colonialism' was the best he could come up with.

Maybe we should all Google 'anti-colonialism' so we have a better understanding of the danger looming behind our president's true Kenyan agenda. Because even though we fear what we don't understand, definitive concrete sources of danger are much more effective in instilling long-lasting terror.  So here is something to seriously fear.  The Republican party is searching for a 2012 poster child...and there is a very good chance that the only candidate more promising than Sarah Palin that they can Newt Gingrich. Be afraid people.  Be very afraid.